A Story Of Personal Gratification
Updated: Apr 23, 2020
When I started my Instagram account, Bakes By Becca, I was very scared and started doubting my craft that I had and still am perfecting to this day.
The first couple of weeks, were met with a small growth and following I think I had about 20 followers mostly friends and family.
Then a huge cloud lifted me up and I starting, like most people, realising my growth, it was noticeable, comments started appearing. The little notification icon on my phone started becoming constant and the sound of my phone vibrating gave me a certain ''Buzz'' and with this Buzz came a very dark place.
This buzz, as a 16-year-old baker made me feel visible and important. As a met new creators on Instagram, many in my position, young or new to Instagram I started to feel part of a growing community - this feeling was amazing. As the minutes, hours and days flew past I started having more and more ideas about cakes I could bake and sweet treats I could make. New flavour combinations and presentation ideas, I even went out I bought serving plates to take gorgeous photos to showcase my cakes.
I started following trends and made cakes in collaboration with other AMAZING bakers. I really tried to balance my schoolwork with my passion for baking. This was not easy as I kept wanting to try new things out and show people what I could do and most importantly I wanted to make people proud.
And then it started, a downward spiral of inspiration. A had a lack of inspiration, as I stared at my phone all I saw was the people in my community creating more and more beautiful cakes with more and more intricate designs.
I still loved baking, but I somewhat didn't want to do it anymore and that made me sad. Of course, I still wanted to bake but having been at that high point before, I couldn't see any gratification in likes or follows for my posts.
As the summer is rolling in, I am starting to feel that ''buzz'' I had felt. I have more time and can't wait to create more amazing bakes not for public gratification but personal gratification.
I love baking and always will, I will keep posting new content for you but more importantly for MYSELF.
Thanks, Becca XX
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